A year ago today, Oct 6th, 2018, around 10:30 am central time, on a Greyhound bus, near the borders of two countries - the United States of America and Mexico, the trajectory of my life took a drastic turn. My life as I knew was crumbling and all I could do was watch it crumble into pieces.
On this appointed day, I found myself being summoned to a "Govt retreat" (aka Detention Center) hosted by ICE - Immigration and Customs Enforcement.😀That day felt like the death of who I was.
The 40-day experience was traumatic. And there were many lessons and blessings that I experienced while in the detention center, in the desert of New Mexico. I was forced to face myself in a real, no bullshit kind of way. I got real about no longer being invisible in my own life. I also had to search my heart and confess some secrets to loved ones. I gained a new understanding of what love looks like through my family, friends and even so-called strangers.
Being stripped down to a prison jumpsuit, a blanket that was barely long enough to cover me, and having to sleep on a bunk bed in a warehouse-type building, was a shock to my system and brought me to my knees, metaphorically speaking.
I became fully aware of my privilege as a British citizen (and I milked it when I needed to). Yes, I did! I was clear about what I was doing and I used it when needed. It was my "calling card" to holding on to my dignity. The detention centers are designed to strip you of your human dignity. I wasn't going to let them win. There were times I was afraid that I was going to "pop." I had to develop a strategy to make sure I didn't lose my mind. There is nothing as scary as becoming fully aware that, one word, one thought, one encounter, could alter your mental health for the worse. Thankfully, I had the understanding and awareness of what I needed to do to stay sane.
I had no idea how long I was going to be in there, which was a stressful thought, to say the least. I knew that I had to do my best, all things considered, to maintain my mental health with all that I was going and growing through.
40 days and 40 nights later, I was set free. I resurrected! That date in Nov 2018 represented a new journey, a new path, a new territory... It was scary and yet, I felt nervously excited for what's to come.
A year later, I am in a place of deeper gratitude for life and my life. I am grateful for all of those who helped me maintain my sanity while I was in the detention center and the continued support.
One of the things I have learned from this experience is, life is committed to breaking us open... open to live life fully, to connect with another, to love deeply, to become more empathetic, to allow in what we say we want, to know that we are worthy and to know that WE ARE ENOUGH!!
It is also important to say that, there were relationships and things that died because of what I went through, which caused pain. There are times when I still feel the pain and sadness of the loss. What to do? I keep moving forward while being aware of what I feel. Sometimes, I can invite the emotions to sit at the table with me and other times not so willingly. However, they eventually pass because nothing is permanent.
I am stronger. I am wiser. I am grateful for the man I have become. I am grateful that the experience broke my heart open... to experience life with a more heart-centered attitude.
When life breaks you open, stay open. It is the safest place to be. Life has your back. You are Life. Life is you! She knows your heart’s desires. Trust her. Trust yourself!
The experience pulled me into a low place and it has now catapulted me to a new high. A year later, I am not bitter. I am better. I am on a date with destiny!
How is Life showing up for you today?
When you look through the window of your mind, what do you see?
When you look through the window of your heart, what do you see?
Whatever you see is a fleeting moment of Life reflecting Itself back to you.
Smile and wave… Be grateful!
Trust Life! She knows what you need.
She will provide it all… and some.
Life is good! And it is always getting better!
Believe me, when I tell you, Life KNOWS what Life is doing!
I am a witness!!! When things look or feel shitty, a shift is coming!!
I also know that in the midst of the shitty times, challenge, hurt or struggle, this idea of "Life knows what Life is doing" may be FAR from your mind. Just breathe!
Listen to your feelings and body and ALWAYS ask for support!
Divine Order is ALWAYS in order!
#LifeLessons #ProvenPractices #LongRoadToFreedom #TrustLife
There are those who think Love is passive. There is ABSOLUTELY nothing passive about Love!
LOVE is ACTIVE!
If you want to create positive change in the world, you MUST fall in LOVE!
Try it! I dare you!! Love will ROCK your world!!!
#SoulDance #Love #TuneIn #LoveIs
Happy Mother's/Mothering Day to all the women reading this!
Mothering is a gift from the Divine. It is your birthright. It is not limited to whether you birthed a child through your physical body. You are all mothers and deserves to be acknowledged and honored.
Thank you for being the physical embodiment of the aspect of the Divine that loves unconditionally, nurtures, soothes the deepest of wounds and brings harmony to the human conditions.
Also, I want to acknowledge that we live in a world that is learning to love and affirm all... and yet, fails to celebrate brown mothers/mothers of color. With that being said, I honor and acknowledge brown mothers, for all that you do, even when you sometimes feel that the world is against. You are never alone and Life has your back.
Whatever your journey has been with your mother, give thanks for the fact that she passed life unto you. She is part of the reason you are here.
May the loving Presence of God/Goddess heal us all.
Peace and Blessings.
I received this (see below) today from my dear friend and mentor - Rev. Mary Ruffner. I also call her my spiritual midwife, because she always seems to know the exact words to speak when I am in the midst of birthing a new reality. . . needing a shift in consciousness.
May Rev. Mary's words shift your consciousness in recognizing and re-membering that the Christ Consciousness dwell in you.
Peace and Blessings,
It was Palm Sunday back in 1972 when I entered a Religious Science “church” (now called “center”) for the first time. At the time I didn’t realize it was Palm Sunday. I was simply drawn to a spiritual community that I had heard about; one that was completely foreign to anything I had previously known about religion.
The minister was telling a familiar story in a very unfamiliar way. Yet, for the first time the story made perfect sense to me. It suddenly became the story of my unfolding experience of life. My True Self was aroused. I followed the dramatic tale from Palm Sunday to Good Friday until the crescendo on Easter Morning.
From the moment I first heard that life-changing account until now, I have studied, practiced, and taught the Life Principle that moves us from who we believe we are (the ego) to a realization of who we truly are (the Christ).
When I use the term “Christ” I am referring to a state of being where one knows his/her inseparable oneness with the Divine. I fully acknowledge that this Christ Consciousness became fully orbed within the personage and life of Jesus, the great example. He demonstrated that the presence of God is within each of us. His story is indeed our story. While the people, places and things involved in his journey may not be our personal experience; nonetheless, upon close examination we may very well discover that they truly represent the people, places and things we encounter in our journey of awakening to our True Selves.
Ernest Holmes said, “Jesus could not help but become The Christ as the human gave way to the divine.” The same potential is ours. At the center of our being is the exact image and likeness of God. Paul, the apostle, is known to say, “Christ in you the hope of glory.”
As metaphysicians, the familiar story may not be taken literally. And I say, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter if it is seen as mythology; an allegory; or a historical, political event – the message itself is timeless.
“Everything must change, nothing stays the same. Everyone must change. Nothing stays the same. The young become the old, Mysteries do unfold. 'Cause that's the way of time.
Nothing and no one goes unchanged.
There are not many things in life you can be sure of.
Rain comes from the clouds, and sun lights up the sky, and humming birds do fly.
Winter turns to spring. Wounded hearts will heal. Never much too soon. Everything must change.”
No matter what your perspective is, may this season be a time of Love, Light and Joy."
The idea of joining with "like minded people" sounds good. However, sometimes, you just might find out that your "like-minded" buddy doesn't quite see things in the particular like you do. This is good news. Now, you have a great opportunity to grow and deepen your relationship. #GrowthIsMessy
Being like-minded doesn't mean you see the world the same way. Maybe we need more "open minded" people in the world, rather than "like minded" people. Just thinking out loud. #CarryOn
In life, people can betray you, abuse your trust, or simply move on.
These experiences can leave you feeling uncomfortable in your own skin, and even wounded.
However, it is important not to betray yourself.
Remember. no matter how fast you run, you can never run away from yourself.
You might as well make love with yourself.
You might as well make peace with yourself.
You might as well embrace your experiences and journey.
Wherever you go, there you are.
The truth is, what you are really looking for is you.
You are what you are looking for.
You are the answer to your prayers.
Return home to yourself.
Run home to your heart.
It is the safest place to be.
Then, the people and experiences that you attract will be reflections of the safety you created within yourself.
"I love everyone." is a passive statement. Oftentimes, it doesn't mean anything.
If you really want to create a shift in the world, love in the particular.
Love the annoying neighbor. Love your ex who refuses to sign the divorce papers. Love the customer service rep with an accent, who is reading from a list of instructions of "How-to’s." Love the family member who believes you are full of shit for believing that love is the answer to all of humanity's shortcomings.
Love ain't no joke. It is much more than an emotion. Love is active. Love is unconditional. When you allow love to move through you, it will break you open to more love than you have ever imagined. It will transform YOUR life.
Love will lead you Home . . . back to yourself.
Our purpose is often birthed out of pain. Out of pain, the essence of who we are is resurrected.
If we can just be patient enough, gentle enough, compassion enough, and still enough with the process that is unfolding through the painful experience, we will find ourselves . . . our TRUE Self.
But this is not the only path to finding one’s purpose. There are many paths to discovering our purpose and rediscovering who we really are. Stay awake!